The One Adjustment That Made a Difference: How I Conquered After-Work Stress Via an Surprising Find in the Loft

I often feel like a coiled spring after work. Tension grips my shoulders, my breath turns fast and shallow. Usually, the sound of my laptop lid slamming shut would be followed by the squeak of a cork pulled from a bottle of red, wine poured quickly into a glass, that first mouthful putting a much-needed full stop on the working day.

Then, a few months ago, I discovered an old school recorder belonging to my grown son in the attic. Curious, I blew into it, immediately transported back to the days it was the bane of my life – his daily practice a violent assault on my eardrums, the piercing shriek still reverberating through my head long after he slept.

Instead of throwing it away, I took it down, together with a beginner’s songbook. Growing up, I had no musical talent whatsoever. I took recorder classes in primary school, but never had the opportunity to learn other instruments.

Googling “how to play the recorder”, I watched dozens of YouTube videos aimed at children, and printed out a fingering chart. I searched “easiest recorder tunes”, I felt excited when I played a recognizable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Admittedly, it was something your average five-year-old could master before first break, but as a tone deaf, impatient and stressed 51-year-old, it seemed like a major triumph.

My son questioned my actions (and please could I stop), but I kept going – I enjoyed the sensation the recorder gave me. My inability to remember anything meant I had to concentrate on the sheet of paper in front of me, and carefully mimic the finger placements. My breath calmed, I was focused, and once I’d mastered that first faltering tune, I was overjoyed. I had managed to play music.

Today, several months later, I can handle other children’s songs and a decent Ode to Joy. Sure, my timing is rubbish, and I still need to write the names of the notes down, but to me, it’s not about being skilled or a “musician” – it is simply about the pleasure it brings and how it clears my mind while playing.

I read that only one in six children learn to play the recorder now, which probably relieves parents, but it made me a little sad and nostalgic for my own school days, and my son’s childhood.

I make it a habit to play each night after work as my first activity, and in those 20 or so minutes, I am in my own little world. Afterward, I feel totally energised and uplifted.

My friends think it’s hilarious, yet a therapist friend informed me I was not only lowering my stress levels, but improving my cognitive skills, like memory and sound processing, which is precious at my age. And in terms of my day-to-day wellbeing, it’s truly an ode to joy.